The first rain

I love the sun because I am always cold during fall/winter/spring/sitting too close to the AC. But I have been craving the rain. I did not know it until I first smelled sweet, wet grass and heard the rain pattering on the roof. The front lawn is dry, the trees are looking stressed, and everything is a bit parched. It is no wonder that people like to dance outside when water falls from the sky.

There are times where my heart feels parched, too. Worries beat down, responsibilities become a rough climb, and expectations load me down like a backpack full of rocks.

David wrote in Psalm 42,

“1 As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?”
He feels like God is far away, enemies are much too close, and trouble is all around. Yet he says,
5 Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation 6 and my God.”

I come back to this verse over and over, especially as I lift my face up to catch fat drops of wet on my eyelids. I feel downcast. I will look to God. It seems like He is hitting me with wave after wave. But His love never stops.

God hears the deep cries of my soul that barely surface in coherent thought. In fact, the Holy Spirit intercedes with groans that can’t be uttered.

26 In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; 27 and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God“(Romans 8).

Not only does He intercede, but God knows what all the groanings mean! So He knows my heart better than I know it! And that is a deep comfort.

God, thank You for the rain. I feel like I am a little spiritually dehydrated right now, and trying to absorb You one minute and getting distracted the next. God, You are good. Thank You for the problems that point me back to You, my help. Please help me to have soul-satisfaction in You, no matter how dry my circumstances. And thank You for loving me so well, no matter where I am. To You be the glory, God. Amen.

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