Embrace Inadequacy

My friends call me Spock, and it especially makes sense when my mind is in overdrive late at night. Here’s my latest conundrum: I do not understand love. It inspires people to do crazy things and give up so much. Much less do I understand God’s love to pursue ungrateful creations to the point of dying for them. But I’ve known for a long time you can’t “logic” God.

As Paul says in Romans 5,

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Love makes me feel inadequate for the goodness showered on me. Once I accept it, how do I live in that knowledge? How do I grasp the scope of what it means?

I was talking with a friend and came up with this equation:

Love: Inadequacy + Gratitude = Worship.

 

Ephesians 2

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

How do I respond? Thankfulness. Every day, being thankful for what I have, and what God is giving to me. I do not have to repay love with an equal portion. While I can respond in-kind, the love is not based on my actions. It is okay to feel inadequate – it is an accurate reflection of my abilities. But love is not based on laws, but on relationships, specifically with a Father-God who loves me, and wants me to be part of what He is doing in the world. And that is exciting!

God, please help me to respond better to Your love. I do feel inadequate and frustrated by that. God, thank You for the crazy, illogical way You love. And please help me to learn how to receive that and give it to those around me, especially to those who are hard to love. Amen.

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